commentary · politics · Uncategorized · writers

The New “F” Word

The New F-Word

There are a few words that illicit some very visceral responses when heard in conversation or seen in print. Some of those words, however, when spoken, rise up within us, sometimes deliciously so, when we find the exact right word to use when we absolutely need it. Fuck! Asshole! Fucktard! The words roll off the tongue in a satisfying way, sometimes self-satisfying way; smug.
Those words were invented to express our most explosive emotional thoughts and feelings. Which is good, we need to release pent up frustration and emotion; yes it can be hurtful, deeply inappropriate and sometimes unwarranted but it is part of being human.

The new F word, in my opinion

But the new F word, in my opinion is Feminism, in past, condescendingly and patronizingly defined as whiny or needy, is fast approaching being exclusively described as radical, offensive, aggressive, in-your-face call to arms that has women who embrace its goals as self-interested to the point of exclusion of all else; and no acknowledgement it still is a positive endeavor to level the playing field. Look no further than the recent Women’s March on Washington earlier this year in response to President Donald Trump being elected, someone who, in short, unabashedly objectifies women, when social media lit up with claims of violence and rioting during the event, none of which was documented (officially or unofficially) or confirmed by officials in the state’s capital. In fact, Feminism has been described as female supremacy, not equality.
And perhaps not in the way you expect? Feminism, may I suggest, in its infancy was pretty easy to understand; Fem·i·nism: to define, establish, and achieve political, economic, personal, and social rights for women. In short, women wanted equal access to, vote, employment, property ownership and education. 
While there has been success won on those fronts, the definition, or perhaps more accurately, the goals of Feminism has evoked new challenges.  For instance, now that we are allowed to work, we also want the same wages and benefits, opportunities, voice, control and influence; free from gross generalizations that strong voiced, opinionated women are bitches, unladylike or butch. Sigh, more on that later.

Feminism is really just anti-menism
Man haters?

Now, I’m pretty sure there are many who were around for the first wave of Women’s rights who would laugh at the suggestion its “newly” offensive to use it, be it, or promote it; the struggles of the brave trailblazers who tenaciously stood their ground and those whose efforts will likely never be truly recognized in history books. But, the common complaint from men about modern day Feminism is “you already have that” or, “what more do you want?” In fact there are men who narcissistically discredit modern Feminism is the new anti-menism, man haters; women who don’t just want what men “have” , but want to eliminate or eviscerate men have, obviously different from women seeking equity, it being a grab at their “privilege”. How many of us have heard “white men are a dying breed” or “you can’t be a white man and get a job anymore”?
And doesn’t that premise answer itself? Privilege must exist in order to be felt and lost, doesn’t that substantiate it exists, therefore creating a need for….feminism?

My generation’s job was
to make sure it stuck

I get it, even when I started in the workplace; in larger organizations, the subtleties were almost imperceptible, especially if you weren’t looking for them. Something would happen and you would walk away with a slightly uncomfortable feeling and upon reflection you would think, hey, that wasn’t right. If you were brave enough and said something, it would get fixed, reluctantly, but it would. That was my world, the heavy lifting done by women who came before me; my job was to make sure it stuck.
Young women today have a few decades of stewardship of the values won by women over the last 100+ years. It really should be a resounding victory when I see a young woman gasp at the idea of naked women calendars in bosses’ offices when I started my career. It is a sign we have made a difference.
In absence of blatant sexism we can be relax; confident what is right will be forthcoming? Confident there is no chance there may be a subtle erosion of the gains we made by way of, appealing to our sense of fairness; undermining by minimizing or accusation of exaggerated demands; or a truly unfortunate situation of women who denounce feminism in order to fit in or get ahead.
Unfortunately we can’t just sit back and relax and here is why. There remains today a mindset that equality is a privilege, it is owned by someone and can be doled out in pieces, carefully measured so that the predominant owners remain in control.

Sexual harassment???
It’s a compliment

Why else might modern women rebuff feminism? How about the Faye Weldon’s of the world who wrote:  Why Feminism is bad for Two-Thirds of Women. Her position is it isn’t really that bad. I mean sexual harassment? It’s a compliment. Pay equity? You should be glad to have a job; in fact, your presence in the workforce divides a man’s wages in half. I haven’t dug deep enough into the abyss to find out what she bases that on? But she plays upon something we teach our girls. We are strong, we can thrive, we don’t need taking care of, and we don’t need someone else to be successful. So, why do we need feminism? We are perfectly capable of having a fulfilling life without depending on a man giving it to us? Correct? But who says equality is something to give or take? 

Post-feminism, radical feminism,
Conservative feminism

No doubt, Feminism has evolved into what is described as waves; post-feminism, radical feminism, conservative feminism, socialist feminism, Anarcha-feminism, post-structural feminism, the list is long. All of these incarnations have built on the initial premise of equity and opportunity/expression, equally available to and neither enhanced nor denied by gender. These waves were borne from the first, modest wins, of women in the workforce, post-secondary institutes and boardrooms etc. They evolved to answer or address focused issues women feel are still relevant.
Back to today and where Feminism fits in to today’s society. I mentioned earlier it is has become popular to rebuff feminism, even if you are a woman. (We will get back to modern men later)  In my experience there are a few reasons. For some young women, they have never known what it is like to be slapped on the ass in the office, fired because they object to it, (or worse) refused a job because they were of child bearing age or asked to get coffee for the boss. I admit myself so many incarnations of feminism is both hard to grapple and hard to justify.

Could it be just a visceral response to global
Economic vulnerability?

It plays into the minority of men still hate the idea they “have” to share the workplace, there are still men centric careers; be “sensitive” to women’s issues, and have to be polite and respectful. In a broad sense, I see a somewhat silent majority of men who see women as competition in the workplace; an “us vs them” mentality. If women are taking over the workplace where that does leave me? How many of us have heard the comment, “I’m a dying breed” from a Caucasian man? Maybe it’s one more thing to add to the laundry list of economic challenges we face as a whole, in terms of jobs, housing and cost of living in general. Is this just a visceral response to global economic vulnerability and it is perhaps now sorely affecting the gentry, Caucasian population.

You have your job,
   now go away

You have your job now go away. If things were truly equal there would be no pay equity fights, we would not be subjected to passive aggressive objections to women “taking over” or beating a dead dog. It would not be referred to as Female Superiority by pundits; it would not be used as an insult, there would be no rolling of the eyes. When those are gone and erased from the faces of its opponents, we will be done, for now it seems, we are not done.
Beauty · Natural remedy · Uncategorized

Wonders of Baking Soda

bakingsodaPeople have re-discovered the magic of baking soda in recent years. My mom taught me to use it as a cleaner for the silverware. I mixed it with a bit of vinegar and rubbed it into the utensils and it polished it up very nicely. It was inexpensive and organic.

I have since used for a few other things; conditioning and removing chemical build up in my hair; removing a grease stain from clothing and cleaning & sanitizing my coffee maker.

Image result for shiny hairHair:

in the shower I would wet my hair and depending on how much hair you have (I have a LOT) take about 1/4 -1/3 cup of baking soda and rub it into your scalp. I usually do this in a couple of handfuls – not the whole amount at once. Then work it through your hair until you feel all of it is spread throughout. Then rinse well. It does take a bit longer to rinse the baking soda out, but you should feel the difference immediately! This removes the buildup of hard water, soaps/conditioners and hair products that stick to your hair. Your hair should feel soft and silky! I admit I have not used it on dyed hair, you should check with your hairdresser.

Image result for grease stain on shirt

Grease stains:

 I have had great success in using this method. Say you drop a bit of oil on your shirt, maybe peanut butter? I sure have! I take the clothing and put it on the washer, I make a paste of the baking soda and put rub it into the stained area. I let it sit for a bit or just leave it as it until I do laundry next. This absorbs the oil and leaves not stain behind. I have even had pretty good success with this method after you wash the item. You know how you take something out of the dryer and notice a dark stain or the fabric is darker in one spot? Usually eye level? It is not 100% but I would say when I catch it before it goes through the laundry – it is about 95%. After? About 70%.

Image result for coffee potCoffee pot:

Easy, you put about 2 tablespoons into the unit where you usually put the coffee and run the water through it. If the pot needs a bit more care – you can swish about 1 tsp into the pot and voila! All nice and clean.

Hope you liked these tips I have gathered along the way 🙂

love · poems · poetry · Uncategorized · writers

There He Stands

There he stands
I breathe when he breathes
My heart beats faster as he draws near
The world falls silent
I stand in great fear
 Fear my thoughts expose a secret
My heart strains to keep
My mind screams, flee!
The earth holds my feet
Captive and enthralled
I feel your breath on my face
Whether near or far
Please, move with grace
Matters not, for I feel
Lost in your gaze
I must break the spell
Or live in a haze
That is beyond my minds power
To guide my heart, how it pines
And speak to it, reason
About that which is not mine?
Mine to gaze, to love, to keep or to seek.
Leanne Anderson


Beauty · beauty products · Kiehl's · product recommendation · recommendations · Uncategorized

Recommendation of the day

Picture3Picture1Picture2Ugh the cost of skin care?

I get that “why does it have to be so expensive!” But, I have to say there are some products that are worth every penny. There are plenty of products that promise things that they shouldn’t and those that you can find for a better price. You only get one of everything, sometimes two, but skin is one of them. If you are a young woman, glowing in the beauty of youth, please take these suggestions to heart:
1.  Cleanse & moisturize well every day. If only once, preferably at night, you skin should be clean and moisturized while you sleep, when your body is      rejuvenating.
2. Cool water splashed on your skin throughout the day will do wonders for keeping it clean and fresh
3. Sunscreen! Tinted sunscreen for formal or office days where you need to look your best.
4. Sunscreen! Yes I did it twice. Better yet, don’t sit in the sun. Sun damage is the worst and longest lasting, virtually irreversible damage you can do to your skin.
5. Wear a hat while in the sun for more than 5 minutes!  It’s like the sunscreen thing but different.
6. Avoid heavy foundation. This is not necessary for ANY age! On younger women it covers up their lovely natural glow and older women, it reveals every nook and cranny you are hoping to avoid! Aforementioned tinted moisturizer which I will highlight on another post.

Today’s Product of choice:

Kiehl’s – this is a great product that does everything it promises. And a whole set of the basics will cost you about $125 but it actually does last you a few months. I admit when I was on a tight budget I didn’t buy the whole “regime” cleanser, toner, daytime moisturizer, nighttime moisturizer etc. But I did buy the one thing that I could not replicate via budget friendly options. Good moisturizer.  I have shared the link to their webpage below.
Value: $$$
$ – Dollar Store
$$ – Drug store brand
$$$ – department store brand/independent brand
$$$$ -High end store/boutique

Welcome to my blog

I have always enjoyed reading and the many writing classes I have taken. I have also dabbled in art, drawing and painting, and photography, up to and including working in a dark room, developing my own prints. I know use my Samsung Galaxy Note 5 as a camera, not as versatile as a SLR camera, but it does the trick.
I have been told I am very resourceful in forging through the financial ups and downs of being a single income family. The (seeming) ease of house ownership etc. I thought I would share some of my strategies on how I achieved some of these goals. They are varied from simple everyday challenges to big ticket purchases like a home.
My featured picture is one of the Pitt River located in southern British Columbia in Port Coquitlam.
I hope you enjoy the photos and poems.